Friday, April 10, 2009

A Year Has Passed

A full year has passed since we gathered at my father's bedside and tearfully bid him "goodbye for now" as we watched him cross the threshold to new life, one void of cancer and other debilitating ailments.

We cried and hugged. We felt somehow abandoned; yet not alone.


"So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. " Isaiah 41:10


We were in disbelief that we wouldn't again hear his voice, feel his embrace, benefit from his advice, be entertained by one of his stories; yet we knew it wasn't forever.

"Brothers, we do not want you to be ignorant about those who fall asleep,or
to grieve like the rest of men, who have no hope." 1 Thes. 4:13


We wondered how we could possibly survive tomorrow, and the next day, and the next; yet we knew we would.

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in
weakness." 2 Cor. 12:9


I kind of have a sense of ... "Whew! Made it." It's a milestone of sorts. We got through this year of "firsts without him" and, though we'll always miss him, perhaps it's possible that future celebrations and occassions will have less sting.

Just days before dad died, he told me that he was confident I'd be okay because God was evident in my life and he knew I trusted Him to guide and direct me.

Well, much has happened this past year. We've endured heartache and trials; experienced losses and made major, life-changing decisions. At times, I yearned for his presence; needed him near; longed for his encouragement; wanted to talk... and not always when times were tough. Often it was to share an experience; a celebration; an adventure; or a laugh.

How many times did mom and I look at each other and say, "Dad would have loved this...?" Too many to count. Oh, and Joe wanted so desperately to be able to discuss that amazing Syracuse basketball game with him!

But Dad was right. I'm okay. We're all okay. We got through this year; and not just "got through it," we lived it and enjoyed it in spite of missing him so desperately, and I believe it's because...

God's grace is sufficient.



A precious moment and one of my favorite memories.

3 comments:

Dot O said...

Pam, you were so fortunate to have him in your life. My beliefs tell me that he is with you every step of the way and probably has a hand in guiding you in some of those decisions.

Have a Happy Easter!

Silvola said...

Dear Pam, I have written you a comment under "Prayerlife", March 9th. I might have the book you are looking for. :) You can find my contact details in my blog by following the link in the title.

Yours,

Markus

Silvola said...

Pam, thank you for your comment. I only need your email address. You can send me an email and I'll get back to you. You will find my contact details on the sidebar of our blog. My email follows the pattern:
firstname.lastname@gmail.com

I'm looking forward to tell you more about the book!

Markus

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I'm a wife, mom, and grandma living in rural Vermont. I spend 40 hours of my week working outside my home and away from my garden, but am nevertheless passionate about healthy eating and sustainable living. By sourcing nutrient-dense food from local farms and avoiding processed foods, we are realizing how our over health is being impacted for the better. I’m excited to have you join me as I share what we’re learning and invite you to offer your insights in the comments. “…giving thanks in all circumstances…” 1 Thess 5:16-18